"We must have had 99 percent of the game. It was the other three percent that cost us the match."- Ruud Gullit
A splendid encounter at a sodden Happy Valley – two evenly matched teams playing a similar brand of attacking football in the correct spirit of the game. Sadly for Pilsner the result did not go in their favour, despite having control for long periods of the match and playing some of their best football so far this campaign.
A poor start meant Brooklyn were always chasing the game, as after only 5 minutes, slack marking allowed Marist to take the lead, via an intricate interchange of passes down the middle. Once into their stride however, the ball began to be knocked around with confidence by Pilsner, particularly by Carl, eager to get back into the action after a couple of weeks break. Good build up play down both drier flanks with Doug combining well with Ed on the left and a similar scenario on the right with James ably assisted by debutant Ben.
However, once again Pilsner switched off at the back when defending a corner midway through the half, as a deft near post header found its way into the top corner. The home side fought back strongly and John went close with a couple of efforts and a series of inviting crosses went begging. Dan was struggling with a back niggle, but with a lack of firepower on the bench he soldiered on until half time.
A flurry of action just before the break saw Pilsner get a deserved goal back, when Ben’s fierce cross-cum-shot deceived the Marist keeper at the near post. Richie then pulled off a superb save to his right after initially spilling a shot, but could do nothing a few minutes later when a swift Marist counter attack put them 1-3 in front, with literally their fourth attack of the game.
A reshuffle at the break saw Ben replace Dan up front, James move up to midfield, Pete coming on at right back, Trev coming on at left back and Doug moving up to replace Ed in midfield. Despite the raft of changes, Pilsner continued to play some excellent approach football, amid worsening conditions. Mike B came close on a couple of rampaging forays upfield, but both John and Ben began to tire after series of runs through the mud began to sap their energy. Doug later moved to centre mid, replacing Charles, as Ed returned to the fray, but still the final killer pass and finish failed to materialise.
Once more, on a rare counter, Marist netted again after Richie let one slip through his grasp and the ball trickled agonisingly into the corner of the net. Pilnser threw everything at the opposition in the final 15 minutes and reduced the defecit when Carl neatly sidefooted home after determined work by James. Some desperate but committed defending ensured the away side finally came away with the points.
There is no doubting that on a better surface BNU would have got a least a draw out of the encounter, but the lads should be proud of the way they played and even the opposition commented that we deserved more from the game than no points and a very muddy kit.
Team: Richie (6), James (8), Don (8), Mike B (8), Doug (7), Ben (7) , Carl (9), Charles (7), Ed (7), Dan (6), John (7)
Subs: Pete (7), Trev (7), Mike H (6)
MOM: Carl - "He dribbles a lot and the opposition don't like it - you can see it all over their faces." - Ron Atkinson
The Gaffer got the word from Keithy – the tools were in a blue bag stashed in the back of the white merc van parked up in a garage on Thorndon Quay. At 11.30am on the Saturday, Smiffy jumped out of the Gaffer’s Toyota and picked up the gear as arranged, they collected accomplice Shamsy and sped off to the Velodrome to carry out the job. Running behind schedule but, yay, we had a set of nets.
Should have been a breeze - the rest of the crew were ready for action - Hitman Jonny, Safehands Richie, Pompey Pete, Dan the Man, The Prince, The Don, The Duke and Dougsy Malone. They all knew their jobs...or so we thought. Wait a minute that’s only eleven - where the s**t was Mikey (injured), The Viscount (injured), Jimmy (on another job), Jono (on another different job) and Palmy Carl (f**k knows)? The Gaffer’s plans were already looking a bit shaky, but yay, we had a team.
Having Mikey on the inside, with the whistle, was a shrewd move…or so we thought, but we hadn’t bargained for another gang from ‘The Valley’ coming to the ‘Drome to muscle in on things. I’m not talking ‘Happy’ here folks either, more like mean, yellow-clad, Fijian-kinda-Indian, Lower Hutt, dudes. They were well keen to have a few long range pops at us at any opportunity, but yay, most of ‘em were well off target.
No dramas then, but ominous signs, as the BNU lads who pulled off last weeks’ job at JVille just couldn’t raise their game this time around. You could say the wheels got stuck in the mud and when Safehands wasn’t, just before Pilsner were due to take a breather, all of sudden things began to go a bit tits up. Hitman Jonny was firing blanks and the narrow confines of the ‘Drome meant The Gaffer and The Prince had little room to manouvre out wide. But yay, no injuries after 45 minutes.
Despite plenty of honest graft, there just wasn’t enough nous by the Pilsner and the smash and grab was completed when Sangham’s only other shot on target in the whole game whistled into the net late on. The booty was nicked from under our noses - it wasn’t the Italian Job - more of a Fijian-Indian one, but yay, it’s a great film anyway.
Team: Richie (6), Pete (7), Mike B (6), Donald (7), Doug (6), Sham (7), Ed (6), Charles (6), Nick (6), Dan (6), John (6).
A gutsy display by Pilsner took them to joint top spot in the table, where they are making the early running for honours alongside Uni Accies. Lots of pomp and ceremony at the start with our ref inspecting boots, earrings and other regalia, before organising champions league style handshakes and Anzac silence.
In this week of homage to the Monarchy there were right royal performances from Charlie Boy in midfield and the Duke of Bransfield at the back. The former smashed home a left footer from the edge of the box midway through the first half to put BNU in front, while the Duke was imperious at the back throughout the ninety minute ceremony.
Prince Edward Clark had a fine game down the left, being ably supported from the rear by Lord Douglas Lake-Hammond, as did his counterpart James Mark Phillips down the opposite flank. AWOL was Prince Harry Roberts after allegedly partying the Easter Weekend away in Palmy.
However things got a bit ugly when King John was yellow-carded for retaliation after being crudely taken from behind. This only served to galvanise him further and just before the break he rose majestically to head home a corner via the underside of the crossbar. A just reward for a series of stylish Pilsner buildups.
After the interval the event turned into a battle royal and Pilsner lost the dominant Viscount Green, who became the victim of a dubious lunge from the opposition keeper. No worries, the family pulled together, closed ranks and repelled all invaders, except the paraparazzi. Keeper Richie became Waity Katie, as despite all the home side’s huff and puff, he went long periods before feeling any balls.
It was Winning Ugly, Betty commented, but that’s sometimes just how one has to do it. So she gave it the seal of approval and celebrated with a bottle of Yeastie Boys His Majesty.
TEAM : Richie (8), Peter (7), Mike B (9), Don (9), Doug (7), James (8), Charles (8), Shane (8), Ed (8), John (7), Dan (7)
Altered Images and Happy Birthday storm up the charts.
Yep Pilsner are Altered Images alright. Gone is the lack of self belief, the sometimes playing without team spirit, in the crappy old kit. Now the lads are rocking, enjoying their performances and playing like the tight band we all knew they could become. Even the steady drizzle at Te Whaea, one of their favourite venues, failed to put a damper on things, as each member put in a display full of passion and desire.
Miramar in contrast are odd bunch of dudes comprising a few old rockers and loads of Justin Bebo lookalikes, so no wonder they failed to gel on the night. Still they kicked off the evening brightly enough, prompted by their diminutive but experienced player-manager in midfield and one or two of the Justins looked briefly threatening, if there is such a thing.
Pilsner gradually began to find their rhythm, with John in particular enjoying the wide open spaces down the left and although they lost Shane early on, a goal from one of their typically swift counter attacks was always on the cards. Meantime Dan came in for some rough treatment as he was cynically blocked off when bearing down on goal – Simply Red the guys were yelling – but the gaffer, reffing the first half, showed leniency and kept the card in his pocket.
No worries, a few moments later John was through again and finished in trademark style for 1-0, after a good build up. He soon turned provider, putting in several inviting crosses, but the supporting midfield crew were slow to arrive. No keeping the front man out of the limelight though, as he then hit a bum note by missing a sitter from inside the 6 yard box. At the other end birthday-boy Don was marshalling the back line superbly and anything that did find its way through was capably dealt with by cool-hands Richie.
After the interval there was a special guest appearance by Jacky and he turned on the style just as the fans knew he would. However the show took a momentary turn for the worst when Miramar’s player manager took over the whistle and centre stage by awarding a well-dodgy penalty, as James was adjudged to have fouled Justin, or was it Justin, as the ball rolled harmlessly out of play. Richie got a hand to the kick but it was tied up at 1-1. Dan was reluctantly withdrawn, but this allowed Jacky to play up front and after a couple of near misses, he then nailed one into the top left corner for 2-1 lead.
Despite a spirited response from Rangers, the Pilsner defence was outstanding, and the likes of Carl and James in midfield worked their socks off. As the game became increasingly stretched, Charles in particular had several opportunities to put the game to bed, but his final deliveries were a bit off key. No arguing when full-time was up, as the stadium lights went out, so the ref couldn’t add any more than the 5 minutes of additional time that he had already mysteriously allowed.
So to the Southern Cross, in the early hours of Saturday morning, where I felt a bit like the band’s lead singer Claire Grogan. You know - the scene from Gregory’s Girl - where she’s laying on her back looking at the stars and doing the wacky legs-and-arms-in-the-air dancing thing. Just celebrating a very Happy Birthday with The Don, his great man of the match performance and a well deserved three points, that put Pilsner up to joint second spot in the charts.
Don’t Talk To Me About Love. Just footie.
Team: Richie (8), Pete (7), Mike B (8), Don (9), Mike H (8), Doug (7), Carl (7), Shane (7), James (8), John (8), Dan (8)
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